Phone "Survey"

It’s Thursday and the home phone rings at midnight. That’s odd I think to myself… not many people have our home phone number.

“blah blah Good Evening blah blah blah Marks & Spencers Survey Blah blah blah” a man says quickly with a British Accent.

I reply with…”Isn’t it a bit late to be calling for a survey?”

“Please just tell me your 3 favorite colors of socks and 3 favorite colors of lingerie” he says quickly.

“Yeah right”

“Oh come on, you know who this is” he says.

“No I don’t think so”

Click. I hang up.

2 seconds later the phone rings again. I am curious so I say hello. And that was all I said while I listened to this man pleasure himself for 5 minutes. He talked dirty, breathed heavy and I’m sure that I heard the ending. Don't care to go into too much detail.... let’s just say the dirtytalk was mostly around his huge willy, what he was doing with it, and how deep it was going there. I was stifling my laughter and covering the phone up. The third time he rang I answered and quickly hung up.... ending the fantasy for at least a second until he found the next participant in his late night survey.

To whomever you are, thanks for the entertainment. I hope you don’t know where I live.